Constipated People Don't Give A Crap.
Practice Safe Sex, Go Screw Yourself.
If You Drink, Don't Park. Accidents Cause People.
Who Lit The Fuse On Your Tampon?
Please Tell Your Pants It's Not Polite To Point.
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Maybe If That Phone Was Up Your Butt,
You Could Drive A Little Better.
My Kid Got Your Honor Roll Student Pregnant.
If At First You Don't Succeed,
Blame Someone Else And Seek Counseling!
Impotence: Nature's Way Of Saying
"No Hard Feelings".
Horn Broken...Watch For Finger.
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Cleverly Disguised As A Responsible Adult.
It's Not How You Pick Your Nose,
But Where You Put The Booger.
If You're Not A Hemorrhoid,
Get Off My Butt.
I Have The Body Of A God...Buddha.
This Would Be Really Funny If
It Weren't Happening To Me.
So Many Pedestrians - So Little Time.
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Cover Me. I'm Changing Lanes.
If We Quit Voting, Will They All Go Away?
Eat Right, Exercise, Die Anyway.
Illiterate? Write For Help.
Honk If Anything Falls Off.
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He Who Hesitates Is Not Only Lost
But Miles From The Next Exit.
I Refuse To Have A Battle Of Wits
With An Unarmed Person.
You! Out Of The Gene Pool!.
If Sex Is A Pain In The Butt,
Then You're Doing It Wrong...
Fight Crime: Shoot Back!
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Body By Nautilus; Brain By Mattel.
If You Can Read This,
Please Flip Me Back Over...
[Seen upside down on a jeep]
Remember Folks:
Stop Lights Timed For 35 mph...
Are Also Timed for 70 mph.
Guys: No Shirt, No Service
Gals: No Shirt, No Charge.
Ax Me About Ebonics.
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How Many Roads Must A Man Travel Down...
Before He Admits He is lost?
Boldly Going Nowhere.
Cat: The Other White Meat.
Caution - Driver Legally Blonde.
Heart Attacks...
God's Revenge For Eating His Animal Friends.
Money Isn't Everything, But Poverty Sucks!
Saw It...Wanted It...Had A Fit...Got It!
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All Men Are Animals,
Some Just Make Better Pets.
Some people are alive only because
it is illegal to shoot them.
I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
WANTED:
Meaningful overnight relationship.
So you're a feminist...Isn't that precious.
I need someone really bad...
Are you really bad?
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