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1. You notice your tie sticking out of your fly.
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2. Someone uses your tongue for a coaster.
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3. You start kissing the portraits on the wall.
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4. You see your underwear hanging from the chandelier.
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5. You have to hold on to the floor to keep from sliding off.
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6. You strike a match and light your nose.
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7. You take off your shoes and wade in the potato salad.
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8. You hear someone say, "Call a priest!"
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9. You hear a duck quacking and it's you.
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10. You complain about the small bathroom
after emerging from the closet.
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11. You refill your glass from the fish bowl.
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12. You tell everyone you have to go home...
and the party's at your place.
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13. You ask for another ice cube and put it in your pocket.
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14. You yawn at the biggest bore in the room...
and realize you're in front of the hall mirror.
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15. You pick up a roll, and butter your watch.
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16. You suggest everyone stand and sing the national budget.
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18. You're at the dinner table and you ask the hostess to pass a bedpan.
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19. You tell your best joke to the rubber plant.
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20. You realize you're the only one under the coffee table.
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